I’ve heard the expression “battle with cancer” before but until recently I really didn’t appreciate it fully. Did the cancer thing in 2002 and after surgery and 6 months of chemo it was gone. Never really felt like a battle to me that I recall so I always likened the term more to those that have it much worse than I did. Those with terminal or much more serious cases than mine. My brother’s battle which began in 2011 and continues to this day, now they seems like a battle. Even if I do believe he is already healed and am standing on God’s promises and his outlook looks better every day.
After only a few weeks into my 6 months of chemo this time it’s different. A different chemical and maybe I’m just a little older but it sure seems like a battle this time. I wake up thankful every day but I’ve still got a long way to go and it feels so different this time. I feel drained already and my patience has never been my best characteristic. The end of these treatments can’t come soon enough for me. Am I that weak that I can’t endure this for another 5 months? Don’t want to but I know that God will give me the strength, His strength to endure this.
And right there to cheer me on is my brother, who could easily be calling me a light weight, given his chemo/treatment is far more serious than mine. But he encourages me, inspires me and reminds me to stay positive as the battle continues. Ah the battle, now it feels like a battle with wounds and all. And just like any battle it makes a difference who you have on your team.
And my wife, who had been through this before with me is right there beside me helping me to press on while having to take up the slack while I’m operating at lower capacity than normal. She’s been my rock and I thank God every day because he put us together for such a time as this and without her I’d have given up long ago.
Then there are many others, friends and family that have encouraged me and stand ready when reinforcements are needed. I’m thankful to know there are those behind us waiting to step in and hold me up if needed too.
So you see I finally get the battle part. It’s never just a quick fight and it’s over with cancer. Even if you’ve been clear for 13 years, the battle continues. Thankfully regardless of the battle I already know who wins the war. It’s written in red ink on the pages of God’s holy word.